As a painter, I have long been curious about light...its source, its power to illuminate, what creates its radiance and in general, how I see light or more importantly, how the viewer of my art will see it. In painting, depicted light defines the form. This is true regardless of whether the style is realistic, abstract or expressionistic.
Some years back, I attended a lecture with friends by Don Miguel Ruiz, author of The Four Agreements. Don Miguel is a very old man, stooped and made fragile by his failing health. Soft spoken, he radiates a gentleness that is seldom seen these days. I listened and took notes as I did not want to miss anything and I wanted to be able to think about the substance of what he had to say later, in the quiet of my solitude. I must admit that upon departure, I felt his points to be rather idealistic, filled with love, illusion and mysticism. When I got home I was still thinking about one particular thought….Do the stars make the light or does the space between the stars create the light we see?
The more I thought about this, the more I became aware that this was not a question easily answered. As I often do, I took the thought to my studio space…and began to paint my idea of the light filling the ‘space between the stars’. Unknown to me at that moment was the fact that this painting was to become the first in a series of such explorations.
If you have ever been to the Rothko Chapel in Houston
Anger
My intent was to depict the red-hot vortex of the all-consuming emotion that is full-blown anger.
Deceit
If you've ever been deceived, you know first-hand the glittering allure of something you want to believe, but know you shouldn't. Deceit has many layers, and all too often they are beautiful. An encounter with the same person inspired both of these works. In this case, it was great therapy to access and process my feelings, and eventually to regain my inner balance.
At the opposite end of the emotional spectrum, the following two paintings explore the appearance of serenity, and how it is not always as it seems.
The Pond
The surface of the water is still, yet just below is a lot of activity and energy...just as in life there are people who seem calm and uncomplicated, belying the turmoil within.
Prayers from the Garden
This is a painting from my Lenten Series, exploring the roiling emotions within, contrasted with the tranquility of the Garden.
Hidden Within my Heart
In these paintings, I explore my inner self and the emotions that have filled my life at one time or another. I have found that I can depict my life as a series of layers and lines. If you have experienced extreme sorrow, you realize, after a time, that society encourages you to get past it. In your heart, you know that often times those feelings become hidden within. Learning to live with that sorrow and embrace it is a vital part of the healing process. It never goes away completely, becoming one more of the 'layers' of your life.
Art critic Brian Sherwin commented: ‘If you have lived life... really lived it... you know that life is a buildup of layers. Memories are layers of life... experiences are layers of life. The various layers of life can be full of light or darkness – all of it is beautiful. These layers define us.’
I could not have said it better, as the layers, lines, colors and surfaces of my paintings reflect my exploration of inner thoughts and feelings. It is with similar thought that the layers of thin paint applied with a brayer add depth and perception to the visual image of my paintings. I admire contemporary artists who enter into a dialogue with abstraction and the formal aspects of painting, while remaining fully engaged, expressing inner truths, such as their personal journey searching for meaning and beauty.
I have studied with many artists over the years whose work I appreciated on various levels. Each had their mantra that they quoted and adhered to in most of their creative endeavors. As a person develops their own style and methods, some of this wisdom sticks and most doesn’t. We are not ready until the time is right. Often times, this is years after the actual conversation. I appreciate an artist that paints with abandon, as Joan Mitchell did with bright, bold and free paint strokes on huge canvases. She is a heroine for me – her work and spirit have influenced me a great deal. What really excites me about Joan’s work is the fact she painted like she did not care. Of course she cared to make beautiful work but she painted absolutely fearlessly. Notice I said ‘influenced’ and not ‘affected’. To me, influenced means ‘inspired by’, while not being obsessed with copying or emulating the actual works of this great artistic giant. This is an important distinction to me.
Such abandon has encouraged me to scumble, glaze, scratch, and scrape my work until a level of intuitive satisfaction emerges. The painting evolves with an innate sense of the power of imagination and a willingness to let the muse determine the outcome.
Starlight
Using simple form, this depiction of starlight could easily represent a human form taking center stage.
The Face in the Mirror
The thin layers of paint create multiple dimensions in what appears to be a reflected image, revealing an ethereal, dreamlike, almost ghostly appartition. The subtle, waif-like face refuses to be ignored.
Faces in the Crowd
This painting was inspired by the urban landscape of downtown Chicago during the holiday season, filled with people crowding a sidewalk, a feeling of being present but alone. Bright, almost garish colors, representative of the neon signs and the clothing of the passers-by, clash and blend, creating a cacophony of image and implied sound.
As exercises in exploring simple shapes in order to depict complex interpersonal relationships, I chose a square, a triangle, and then a variation on a rectangle as a basis for the next three works.
The Square Within the Square
As this shows, things are not always as simple as they seem.
Whether it be a conversation, a relationship or a chance encounter, triangulation rarely has a positive outcome.
The End in Sight
This painting, for me, represents hope. We can go a long time without seeing it, but we strive to hold onto it as the outcome toward which our journey leads us.
Building on this theme of exploring the possibilities of a geometrical form, I chose a rectangle representing all the opportunities symbolized by an open window.
The Window I
The Window II
The Window III
Using unconventional methods and tools was often frowned upon in art school and workshops. Today’s popular work often has what I call flat, uninteresting opaque paint applied in a fairly predictable manner. I am always excited to find an artist who doesn’t succumb to this method. I simply adore transparent glazes, layered upon layer where depth within the subject occurs and fine nuance of color and form appear. The brayer is a fine example of an unconventional tool. It is quite versatile and has allowed me to create some of my most satisfying work to date.
My paint-stained, well-used (and weary) brayer, one of my favorite creative tools...
This style allows a freer expression of my thoughts, feelings and views. Three little words best describe them: SIMPLE, FEARLESS and FREE.
No paper is safe, as, no part of a work in progress is safe from being scraped, carved into, and drawn on, although I was warned that a painting too ‘tickled’ was not the objective. Robert Levers, Professor of Art, once stated... ‘Create simple forms, be fearless and free in your painting strokes. Do it just once, and see what happens.’ I did…although it took time and many days of facing the white paper to get it right. It worked.
I paint intuitively…from a force that comes from within, without a preconceived outcome in mind. I simply begin painting…then insight, perception; love, desire, and experience take over. It becomes a Zen like experience and I am free to make the art I love so much.
